When I Tried to Be Normal...
Hashimoto’s, high sensitivity, and the body that wouldn’t comply
Hello Thyroid Friend,
Today I have a piece of writing that just flowed through me as I woke up to share with you. It’s very close to my heart, and I hope that it can help give you that permission slip (not that you need it!) to be truly and authentically you. In a world that glorifies stress, busyness, speed, hustle culture and loud noise – it can feel like there is no place for Sensitives and Empaths. But there absolutely is a place for us, when we allow this part of ourselves to fully BE. It’s more of a poetry-style piece than my usual style. It’d be good to hear what you think.
When I tried to be normal
The herd just goes along with whatever the status quo is. Yet my body has never accepted it.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ – do a normal office job, be glued to the screen all day like a robot, under LED lighting, stifled of true creativity, lorded over by dysfunctional bosses – my body said ‘no’ with migraines, vertigo, chronic pain, and chronic mouth ulcers that kept me up at night.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ by maintaining inauthentic relationships that drained my energy and staying in a highly dysfunctional and abusive family dynamic – my body said ‘no'. With stomach pains like twisted daggers, throat tightness like being choked, fatigue like heavy chains.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and silence my needs, speaking the words ‘yes’ when I really meant ‘no’ – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and put myself last – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and drink alcohol – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and eat their food – processed, full of additives, vegetable oils, inflammatory fillers packaged in plastics and BPA packaging – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and drink their tap water – with endocrine-disruptors like fluoride, chlorine and forever chemicals – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and use their personal care products - deodorant with aluminium, toothpaste with fluoride, soap with parabens and make-up with phthalates, my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and take their prescribed medications – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and gaslight myself – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to be ‘normal’ and hated on myself – my body said ‘no’.
When I tried to live the life the way they told me to live it – my body said ‘no’.
Highly sensitive people are the canaries in the coal mine. We are the first to sense the imbalance in our society. For me, I cannot do what the status quo tells me I should do, for it takes a toll on my health.
Highly sensitive people are here to do things differently. They are here to live in alignment with what feels right to their heart. They are here to contribute meaningfully, with purpose and passion.
Highly sensitive people are the artists, dreamers and healers of the world.
When we stop resisting that we are different, and require a deeper meaning to our existence, and surrender to that, it’s surprising how well our health and life responds.
When I stop pushing against that sensitive part of me, and dare to be different, dare to go against the dogma of society and all it’s propaganda, dare to go against the brainwashing of what I ‘should’ be, dare to live my life different - my body finally says ‘yes’.
(Inspired by the title of Dr Gabor Mate’s book ‘When the body says no’)
Much love,
Dani x
PS. I’d love to hear from you! Are you a highly sensitive soul? Did any of this resonate? [Hit reply to this email, or leave a comment over on Substack!]